14 Things to Remember Before You CheatEye Spy Blog 1
Eye Spy discusses things to remember before you cheat:
When presented with the ideal cheating scenario—that is, if a flying saucer lands in the cornfield where you happen to be standing and a female alien of sinus-clearing hotness slithers down the ramp and declares that she wants to come in peace a minimum of four times in the next hour, and you take her up on it because you know no one will ever find out—no one must ever find out.
Someone will always find out.
If you get caught, the law is on your wife’s side. And you won’t lose just half of your stuff. The other half—the golf clubs, the surround sound, the Armani—will be destroyed in a spectacular driveway bonfire as every angry woman you know toasts marshmallows shaped like your testicles.
And if you’re not married? Your longtime girl is bound by no law.
Yes, traveling for business is lonely. Phone home for a bicoastal quickie.
Or, to paraphrase Neil Simon, do to yourself what you would otherwise do unto others.
If a woman who knows you’re spoken for comes on to you, it’s flattering. It’s tempting. But remember that she’s doing it to feed her own ego, not yours. She wants to see how much power she holds over you. And if you take her bait, she then knows she must be superior in every way to your sweetie. Deep down, she has nothing but contempt for both your male weakness and your mate’s existence. That should really piss you off.